Basic guide to choosing new sex toys
Just click 'add to cart' and hope for the best!
While that's one way of going about it (I can't say it's a bad idea if you just wanna try something new), but most people go into shock about how many options are out there and end up paralyzed with indecision. I dont't blame ya! There are literally tens of thousands of toys on the market.
Your next move might be to find some sex toy reviews. Again, this can also be overwhelming because there are thousands of sex toy bloggers. And basing your purchase on someone else's experience may or may not help you because sexual experiences are super subjective. So let's try to simplify it.
First off, try to figure out what KIND of toy you're most interested in. If we want to keep things basic, there are 5 general categories: dildos, vibrators, anal toys, sensory stimulation, and restraints. Scan thru the category headings below and then read into each that catch your interest.
Dildos – penetrating, non-vibrating, probably phallic
I hear lots of people confuse dildos with vibrators. While vibrators can be dildos, I like to reference dildos as non-vibrating, penetrative toys. These are typically phallic in shape, but you can also find some that are more or less discreet. Many come with suction cups so you can stick 'em on any smooth, flat surface and use your hands elsewhere. And of course, there are doubled-ended ones for when you feel like sharing.
Why you'd love a dildo:
- you like to be penetrated
- you like to watch your partner get penetrated
- you like having your partner watch you get penetrated
- you want to be double or triple penetrated
- you don't really enjoy vibrations
- you can heat or cool for more intense feels
- you just love the D
Vibrators – with 1 or more motors that vibrate, rotate, or thrust.
Most vibrators are designed to target the clit, but as anal play has become more popular vibrators are a great tool to warm up that rim before getting some butt action too. They actually can and should be used anywhere on the body that feels good.
There are a few types of vibrators: buzzy, rumbly, and sonic. You can read more about the differences between buzzy and rumbly vibrators here. But sonic ones are the newest craze. Sonic vibrators vibrate at a much higher frequency than your typical vibe. They tend to tickle deeper than just surface stimulation, and they tend to be a smoother cuz the vibration waves are closer together.
Why you'd love a vibrator:
- you enjoy clit stimulation
- you enjoy butt stimulation
- you enjoy internal stimulation
- you have a hard time achieving an orgasm without some type of extra stimulation
- you like being teased
- you enjoy the natural sound of hummingbirds
Anal Toys – plugs, probes and beads for da booty
While some (ok, most) are totally appalled by the idea of entering the exit-only door, those who do tend to really enjoy it. There are several pleasurable nerve endings located in the rectum. If you're a beginner, go small and use lots of lube. Beads are probably the most talked about, but anal plugs are more commonly purchased. If interested in beads, get some that are strung together with silicone and not some porous string or rope that can harbor bacteria. Plugs are typically short and have a flared based so that it cannot slip in too deep. Anal probes are longer than plugs, but also have the safety flared based. ALWAYS have a flared base, or tether for retrieval when playing with anal toys.
Why you'd love an anal toy:
- you're ready to try something new
- you've done a little experimenting with finger pressure and enjoyed it
- you want to be double or triple penetrated
- you ain't scared
Sensory Stimulation – tickle, temperature, pain, smell, etc.
After the Shades of Grey books and movies, everyone has an idea of what sensory stimulation play is. And now there are a ton of new sensory toys available due to new demand. You can be tickled, blindfolded, flogged/spanked, pinched, poked, dripped with hot wax, caressed with ice cubes, seduced with smell. The list goes on. Toys for this include feathers, blind folds, floggers, pelts/paddles, clamps, metal toys that can be heated or cooled, candles, etc. For those who are on the more extreme side of experience, you can play around with some electricity like the Zeus.
Why you'd love sensory toys:
- looking for more foreplay options
- you like incorporating/stimulating all your senses
- pain equals pleasure
- you're a risk-taking adventure
Restraints – tied up or held down
This can be scary for some. Especially if you don't fully trust your partner. But luckily they do make several toys that are somewhat easy-release so you don't ever feel completely trapped…..but there are some toys that will lock you in place for a more elevated experience. Metal hand cuffs are probably the most popular, but those can be painful and irritate the wrist – which isn't bad if you're into pain as well. But there are many other options like soft Velcro straps, non-stick tape, and rope. You also have some really fun bed and door restraint systems, and swings.
Why you'd love restraints:
- you enjoy being submissive and lack of control excites you
- you enjoy being dominant and being in complete control excites you
- you like testing the boundaries of trust
- you're lazy and would rather just be tied up
Hope this helps at least some of you. As you experiment more, you'll get to learn more specifically what turns you on and gets you off. Enjoy!